The internet is full of fakes and flakes… those that pretend they have knowledge and those that actually have the knowledge but are scared to share. Then there are people that claim to be experts that know every last detail about the subject.
I don’t claim to be an expert, although I’ve heard many people use that term when talking about me. I only speak about the experiences I’ve gone through personally, I can only speak about my life and what others have shared with me.
Randall was right to call me out on something I said… I made the statement that “cucks know they are not good at sex”. You’re right, Randall, that’s NOT universally true, and the cuckolding fantasy is almost 100% a mental game. I’ve spoken to many cucks (or wanna-be cucks) that are of average and sometimes above-average penis size, asking if they would be considered small… compared to what I have at home, they’re not small. ;) But in their mind, they are a complete cuckold and unable to provide satisfaction to any woman.
Then you have the men that can go back-and-forth in the roles. One day they are the sexual stud that their wife/girlfriend and any other woman needs (even playing bull to another cuckolding couple). They have the equipment to do the job and they’re not bad at it! Giving her the satisfaction that she craves (for the moment, anyway). Then the next day, he’s in a cuck role, wearing panties and listening to his woman talk about the guy that’ll be over tonight to fuck her silly, and loving every minute of his cuckold role. There are more men that play both roles than I ever realized.
Don’t conform to any one person’s idea of this lifestyle. You may come to someone for advice or ideas, but think on it before acting. Cuckolding is what YOU make of it. The goal is to have everyone involved happier and closer than ever before.
People, what I’m trying to say is, don’t take my comments, thoughts, and musings as the absolute truth. Again, I’m only speaking from MY experiences. I’m no expert on cuckolding, just a simple woman living this lifestyle daily. I couldn’t be happier. :D
Monday, March 29, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
Ultimate.
Yesterday I had a very important phone call. Mike and I have spoken a couple of times, and will probably continue these talks every month or so. He said something that has really started to fester… well, we’ve discussed it before but my mind keeps coming back to it, and I wanted to talk about it.
As women, sometimes we don’t fully understand the lengths our men are willing to go for our happiness, the things they would do that they never once considered doing just to see us smile or tell them how happy we are because of it. Take a man who has never had any interest in wearing women’s lingerie or never had any sexual feelings towards a woman’s feet. If you made the comment that you think it’d be really hot to see your man in a pair of lacy black panties, or how turned on you get when someone licks your toes, you can bet that your man would be opening your panty drawer or pulling off your high heels to make your wishes come true. It has no meaning to them as far as excitement for themselves, but seeing you get aroused by such acts? They’ll do it without a second thought.
It also needs to be said that women are also pushing their comfort levels to try new things to keep things exciting, or to try something her man would like to do. Women take cues from their guy, whether it’s talk during sex about trying out a larger sex toy or bringing in another person – male or female – to make things incredibly exciting, or if it’s something brought up outside of the bedroom, like telling your lady it’s OK for her to go have a girls night out, and saying you’ll help her pick out an outfit to go out in… it’s YOUR hints and statements that let us know where your brain is at (obviously). It helps us to know which paths you’d like us to tread down.
Now it goes without saying that every person should have their “no way” list… as in No way. I’m not into that stuff and won’t ever be, so don’t even push the matter. Sometimes we just can’t make ourselves OK with certain fetishes or ideas, no matter what. However, you must also keep in mind that as people change, so do our comfort levels and thresholds. What once was seen as off-limits may become OK or acceptable down the road. (girl-girl, anal… just sayin’.)
Just knowing that a man would be willing to give up his masculinity for the woman he loves, or that a woman would be OK with experimenting with bondage or humiliation because it's what her man wants to try... speaks volumes about their relationship. The simple fact that one would take something that isn’t their idea of sexy, and make it happen because their partner gets incredibly turned on by it, seems like one great act of love.
As women, sometimes we don’t fully understand the lengths our men are willing to go for our happiness, the things they would do that they never once considered doing just to see us smile or tell them how happy we are because of it. Take a man who has never had any interest in wearing women’s lingerie or never had any sexual feelings towards a woman’s feet. If you made the comment that you think it’d be really hot to see your man in a pair of lacy black panties, or how turned on you get when someone licks your toes, you can bet that your man would be opening your panty drawer or pulling off your high heels to make your wishes come true. It has no meaning to them as far as excitement for themselves, but seeing you get aroused by such acts? They’ll do it without a second thought.
It also needs to be said that women are also pushing their comfort levels to try new things to keep things exciting, or to try something her man would like to do. Women take cues from their guy, whether it’s talk during sex about trying out a larger sex toy or bringing in another person – male or female – to make things incredibly exciting, or if it’s something brought up outside of the bedroom, like telling your lady it’s OK for her to go have a girls night out, and saying you’ll help her pick out an outfit to go out in… it’s YOUR hints and statements that let us know where your brain is at (obviously). It helps us to know which paths you’d like us to tread down.
Now it goes without saying that every person should have their “no way” list… as in No way. I’m not into that stuff and won’t ever be, so don’t even push the matter. Sometimes we just can’t make ourselves OK with certain fetishes or ideas, no matter what. However, you must also keep in mind that as people change, so do our comfort levels and thresholds. What once was seen as off-limits may become OK or acceptable down the road. (girl-girl, anal… just sayin’.)
Just knowing that a man would be willing to give up his masculinity for the woman he loves, or that a woman would be OK with experimenting with bondage or humiliation because it's what her man wants to try... speaks volumes about their relationship. The simple fact that one would take something that isn’t their idea of sexy, and make it happen because their partner gets incredibly turned on by it, seems like one great act of love.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Get it? Got it! Good.
It seems to surprise people when I make a video or write a blog that actually makes sense. Well, maybe I shouldn’t say surprise… more like it sparks conversation and thoughts that one either has or hasn’t had before on the topic – which I MORE than welcome! All this conversation gives me ideas for future videos and such. ;)
On my most recent YouTube video discussing cuckold angst, there was a comment made, saying it seems like I have a very good understanding of the mental aspect of this lifestyle. Not a mean comment by any standards, but more of a compliment. I think what really makes me say “Hmm” is the assumption that a Cuckoldress, living this type of open, honest, meaningful lifestyle daily wouldn’t have an understanding of both sides of the coin.
One of the things I talk about in nearly every video or blog is communication between the cuckold and Cuckoldress. If you’re not open and honest with each other, how can you both expect to benefit from this type of relationship? With me, I may not understand every last bit of emotion that my cuck is experiencing or why he thinks of things the way he does, but I would like for him to try to explain it to me. Even if it means trying to equate it to something I’m going through, or even a hypothetical situation. (And sometimes we have to go through it about five or six times before I finally “get it”.) The best way for me to make this relationship amazing for both of us, is for me to understand his wants and needs.
But wait, Jinxy! Isn’t cuckolding all about what the woman wants? Cuckolding is about the woman’s sexual satisfaction, not necessarily ONLY about the woman wants in all aspects of life. Don’t get me wrong, there are some cucks that get no greater pleasure than being ignored by their woman, as she’s being selfish and it’s all about her… and occasionally she’ll throw the cuck some form of humiliation. (Honestly, I think that’s more of a femdom relationship and less of a cuckolding one, but each cuckolding relationship is different due to other fetishes that are included.) But most cuckolds are just as greedy as we women, they want to get something out of this too. They know they’re not good at sex, so they have to find other ways for excitement and arousal. Knowing what my cuck is excited by, or even what really turns him off, can help our relationship grow. :)
On my most recent YouTube video discussing cuckold angst, there was a comment made, saying it seems like I have a very good understanding of the mental aspect of this lifestyle. Not a mean comment by any standards, but more of a compliment. I think what really makes me say “Hmm” is the assumption that a Cuckoldress, living this type of open, honest, meaningful lifestyle daily wouldn’t have an understanding of both sides of the coin.
One of the things I talk about in nearly every video or blog is communication between the cuckold and Cuckoldress. If you’re not open and honest with each other, how can you both expect to benefit from this type of relationship? With me, I may not understand every last bit of emotion that my cuck is experiencing or why he thinks of things the way he does, but I would like for him to try to explain it to me. Even if it means trying to equate it to something I’m going through, or even a hypothetical situation. (And sometimes we have to go through it about five or six times before I finally “get it”.) The best way for me to make this relationship amazing for both of us, is for me to understand his wants and needs.
But wait, Jinxy! Isn’t cuckolding all about what the woman wants? Cuckolding is about the woman’s sexual satisfaction, not necessarily ONLY about the woman wants in all aspects of life. Don’t get me wrong, there are some cucks that get no greater pleasure than being ignored by their woman, as she’s being selfish and it’s all about her… and occasionally she’ll throw the cuck some form of humiliation. (Honestly, I think that’s more of a femdom relationship and less of a cuckolding one, but each cuckolding relationship is different due to other fetishes that are included.) But most cuckolds are just as greedy as we women, they want to get something out of this too. They know they’re not good at sex, so they have to find other ways for excitement and arousal. Knowing what my cuck is excited by, or even what really turns him off, can help our relationship grow. :)
Thursday, March 18, 2010
hot, creamy, and goooood!
I received a message (via YouTube, if I remember correctly) from someone asking why I called it a “creampie” versus “clean up duty”. That sparked a bit of thought on my part, and I’ll share my musings here. (I’m assuming you all know what that term means. Just in case you don’t, it’s where a man cums inside of a woman’s pussy and then another will give her oral.)
As the author of the message stated, creampie insinuates that there is some feeling of reward to the situation. If you call it clean-up duty, that has a sense of service to it, you are servicing or taking care of your lady by performing clean up. I have honestly called it both terms, not really recognizing the difference in them. That simple message made me really open my eyes and pay attention to how people word things, or think about things.
For submissive men (and let’s face it, most cucks are), taking care of their woman is paramount, it’s the most important thing. If they aren’t able to provide her the satisfaction she needs in the bedroom, they will encourage her to find it elsewhere, yet they will continue to take care of her every need, wish, and want in all other areas. Having a cuck perform clean-up will make him feel great (as well as somewhat humiliated on some level), as he’s able to do exactly as you request, while at the same time participating in your sexual activity.
But calling it a creampie just sounds so naughty, it makes me crave one in me. Knowing some sexy, hung stud is filling my pussy with his hot creamy cum just makes me tingle all over! I think one of the best feelings for me is once my bull has put every last drop inside me and pulls out, some usually trickles down and oozes out of my pussy. Makes me feel like such a slut! I do love that feeling… It’s even better when my cuck can be there, to see it all happen. If I’m in the mood for it, I will let my cuck have the creampie. At that point, I’ve been satisfied; I’ve gotten what I wanted. Why not let my cuck have a little taste of my satisfaction? I get to talk to him about how good it felt to get fucked hard by my amazing bull, and ask him if it tastes as good as I feel. Sure, call it a reward if you’d like. Maybe that’s what it is.
It all depends on your preference of what to call it, but it IS a fetish that is related to cuckolding. Maybe not one everyone is comfortable with this one, and if not – why? I personally only do this with people that I trust… people that have been tested and are safe. (Otherwise, it’s safe sex for me.) I know there is concern about pregnancy as well, and that’s an understandable risk if you’re unable to use birth control.
As the author of the message stated, creampie insinuates that there is some feeling of reward to the situation. If you call it clean-up duty, that has a sense of service to it, you are servicing or taking care of your lady by performing clean up. I have honestly called it both terms, not really recognizing the difference in them. That simple message made me really open my eyes and pay attention to how people word things, or think about things.
For submissive men (and let’s face it, most cucks are), taking care of their woman is paramount, it’s the most important thing. If they aren’t able to provide her the satisfaction she needs in the bedroom, they will encourage her to find it elsewhere, yet they will continue to take care of her every need, wish, and want in all other areas. Having a cuck perform clean-up will make him feel great (as well as somewhat humiliated on some level), as he’s able to do exactly as you request, while at the same time participating in your sexual activity.
But calling it a creampie just sounds so naughty, it makes me crave one in me. Knowing some sexy, hung stud is filling my pussy with his hot creamy cum just makes me tingle all over! I think one of the best feelings for me is once my bull has put every last drop inside me and pulls out, some usually trickles down and oozes out of my pussy. Makes me feel like such a slut! I do love that feeling… It’s even better when my cuck can be there, to see it all happen. If I’m in the mood for it, I will let my cuck have the creampie. At that point, I’ve been satisfied; I’ve gotten what I wanted. Why not let my cuck have a little taste of my satisfaction? I get to talk to him about how good it felt to get fucked hard by my amazing bull, and ask him if it tastes as good as I feel. Sure, call it a reward if you’d like. Maybe that’s what it is.
It all depends on your preference of what to call it, but it IS a fetish that is related to cuckolding. Maybe not one everyone is comfortable with this one, and if not – why? I personally only do this with people that I trust… people that have been tested and are safe. (Otherwise, it’s safe sex for me.) I know there is concern about pregnancy as well, and that’s an understandable risk if you’re unable to use birth control.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Clearly, we're not mind readers!
I talk a LOT about communication, about people being OPEN and HONEST with each other. We can do that when it comes to things we like or dislike in general, and sometimes on a sexual level. But as husbands and wives, do we really open the gates about what we need from our spouse from a cuckolding relationship?
Ladies, when you first started the steps in your cuckolding relationship, did you completely understand everything your husband wanted out of it? Of course not! Honestly, he probably wasn’t even 100% sure what he wanted. I have spoken to a few women that took a step forward, only to end up taking four steps backwards, due to miscommunication and hurt feelings. Men, we’re putting ourselves out on the line when you ask us to partake in this lifestyle… if we do something wrong or don’t completely understand what you need and you “throw a fit” over it or get upset, we’re not going to want to do this anymore. Sad, but true… we think that we’re only going to screw it up and that we’ll have to deal with you being upset after we are with another man every time. Truth is (and I’m talking to both genders now), if we just push through it and keep talking, we will start to understand fully what the other person needs from us.
Here’s an example from my own life. Some of you may be surprised to learn, I wasn’t always good at this. (Shocker!!!) We all have a growing/learning process to go through, and it’s not easy. When I first began this journey, I wanted to go out alone to hotel rooms or to some guy’s place to have sex. Since my husband couldn’t be there, he’d always ask if I would try to take pictures, just so he could see. Not an outlandish request, right? Well, I would always get where I was going and be uncomfortable bringing up pictures, because I thought the guy would be freaked out by it. I mean, I wasn’t really keen on taking pictures (funny how things change, huh?) – why would some random guy be OK with it? So I never even brought it up. I would get home and the first question my husband would ask would be “So did you get any pictures?” Time and time again, I would say no. The look of disappointment and hurt on his face both killed and confused me. I was out doing what he wanted, right? Cuckolding is about having sex with other men to get sexually satisfied, what does it matter if there are no pictures to prove it?
I couldn’t have been more wrong. To him, that small inconsiderate move was like saying “This is for me, I could care less about what you need out of this.” All he needed was to see what was going on, specifically see my face and how happy I was. I wasn’t willing to give him that because at the time it made me a little uncomfortable.
I was so wrong.
Cuckolds tend to get target-fixated, they start to obsess about one particular thing that could happen, they forget about anything else. It could be something as seemingly simple as seeing his love’s face while she’s taking in another man’s larger sized cock, or something as small as hearing her call her lover a specific pet-name while they’re having sex… or even watching her in a certain sexual position. As women, we don’t know what’s inside their head! But it is our job to try to pry it out of them, if they’re not open to tell us outright.
Think about it this way, ladies. Let’s say you were planning a date with this massively hung, good-looking guy. He wanted to take you out on the town, then back to his place for a lot more fun. Well, date night comes around and dude calls to say he’s running late. No big deal, we can wait for a bit… this is going to be a spectacular night! An hour rolls by, and he’s still not ready to go… then another hour. Then you get a phone call saying he’s too tired from working to go out, and he just wants to chill back at his place. Well, there’s a little disappointment but we can still have fun in the bedroom! He swings by to pick you up, and all he can talk about on the drive to his place is work, he hasn’t even said one word about how HOT you look in your new dress and heels. Once at his place, he plops down on the couch and turns the TV on. Dumbfounded, you go sit next to him… some time passes and you try to make a play. He goes for it, and before long you’re in the bedroom – just where you wanted to be all along, right?! Finally! …except it doesn’t last very long. He gets you all worked up and is done in the span of about seven minutes. You’re lying in the bed beside him, ready to rip his head off, because all he could care about is himself! You have needs too!
All that build up, and then you’re let down. That’s how it is in the mind of a cuck. They build themselves up with the fantasy and excitement of what might happen, what they WANT to happen, and when it doesn’t happen, they freak out.
It took a while for me to understand this concept. Now that I get it, it’s easier for me to ask him what he’s been thinking about, what would be the most exciting thing for him to see/hear while I’m with one of my men… taking the time to talk about what he wants will help you to understand what he is target fixated on, what he’s obsessing about.
Trust me ladies, once “that thing” happens, he’ll be over it and moving on to the next obsession. That’s not a bad thing either, it helps you both to grow sexually and push your limits, making things more exciting. =)
Talk to your cuck. Cucks, talk to your woman. We aren’t mind readers!
Ladies, when you first started the steps in your cuckolding relationship, did you completely understand everything your husband wanted out of it? Of course not! Honestly, he probably wasn’t even 100% sure what he wanted. I have spoken to a few women that took a step forward, only to end up taking four steps backwards, due to miscommunication and hurt feelings. Men, we’re putting ourselves out on the line when you ask us to partake in this lifestyle… if we do something wrong or don’t completely understand what you need and you “throw a fit” over it or get upset, we’re not going to want to do this anymore. Sad, but true… we think that we’re only going to screw it up and that we’ll have to deal with you being upset after we are with another man every time. Truth is (and I’m talking to both genders now), if we just push through it and keep talking, we will start to understand fully what the other person needs from us.
Here’s an example from my own life. Some of you may be surprised to learn, I wasn’t always good at this. (Shocker!!!) We all have a growing/learning process to go through, and it’s not easy. When I first began this journey, I wanted to go out alone to hotel rooms or to some guy’s place to have sex. Since my husband couldn’t be there, he’d always ask if I would try to take pictures, just so he could see. Not an outlandish request, right? Well, I would always get where I was going and be uncomfortable bringing up pictures, because I thought the guy would be freaked out by it. I mean, I wasn’t really keen on taking pictures (funny how things change, huh?) – why would some random guy be OK with it? So I never even brought it up. I would get home and the first question my husband would ask would be “So did you get any pictures?” Time and time again, I would say no. The look of disappointment and hurt on his face both killed and confused me. I was out doing what he wanted, right? Cuckolding is about having sex with other men to get sexually satisfied, what does it matter if there are no pictures to prove it?
I couldn’t have been more wrong. To him, that small inconsiderate move was like saying “This is for me, I could care less about what you need out of this.” All he needed was to see what was going on, specifically see my face and how happy I was. I wasn’t willing to give him that because at the time it made me a little uncomfortable.
I was so wrong.
Cuckolds tend to get target-fixated, they start to obsess about one particular thing that could happen, they forget about anything else. It could be something as seemingly simple as seeing his love’s face while she’s taking in another man’s larger sized cock, or something as small as hearing her call her lover a specific pet-name while they’re having sex… or even watching her in a certain sexual position. As women, we don’t know what’s inside their head! But it is our job to try to pry it out of them, if they’re not open to tell us outright.
Think about it this way, ladies. Let’s say you were planning a date with this massively hung, good-looking guy. He wanted to take you out on the town, then back to his place for a lot more fun. Well, date night comes around and dude calls to say he’s running late. No big deal, we can wait for a bit… this is going to be a spectacular night! An hour rolls by, and he’s still not ready to go… then another hour. Then you get a phone call saying he’s too tired from working to go out, and he just wants to chill back at his place. Well, there’s a little disappointment but we can still have fun in the bedroom! He swings by to pick you up, and all he can talk about on the drive to his place is work, he hasn’t even said one word about how HOT you look in your new dress and heels. Once at his place, he plops down on the couch and turns the TV on. Dumbfounded, you go sit next to him… some time passes and you try to make a play. He goes for it, and before long you’re in the bedroom – just where you wanted to be all along, right?! Finally! …except it doesn’t last very long. He gets you all worked up and is done in the span of about seven minutes. You’re lying in the bed beside him, ready to rip his head off, because all he could care about is himself! You have needs too!
All that build up, and then you’re let down. That’s how it is in the mind of a cuck. They build themselves up with the fantasy and excitement of what might happen, what they WANT to happen, and when it doesn’t happen, they freak out.
It took a while for me to understand this concept. Now that I get it, it’s easier for me to ask him what he’s been thinking about, what would be the most exciting thing for him to see/hear while I’m with one of my men… taking the time to talk about what he wants will help you to understand what he is target fixated on, what he’s obsessing about.
Trust me ladies, once “that thing” happens, he’ll be over it and moving on to the next obsession. That’s not a bad thing either, it helps you both to grow sexually and push your limits, making things more exciting. =)
Talk to your cuck. Cucks, talk to your woman. We aren’t mind readers!
Monday, March 8, 2010
Guest Blogger: Angela
The more you put yourself out there, the more people come to you! I have been emailing back and forth with today's guest blogger, Angela, because she's writing a book on fetishes, kinks, and fantasies. She would like some help from my blog readers! Please respond to this blog entry with your comments and answers to her questions. I want this to be a great help to her, so get to work! ;)
-----------------------------
Hi everyone,
My name is Angela and I’m an Australian doing some research for an upcoming publication on fetishes and kink. Jinxy has been kind enough to help with me some information on cuckolding and also given me the opportunity to pose some questions here on her blog to those of you interested in cuckolding.
First off I’m interested to know what attracts a man to being a cuck. Some of you will be already living this lifestyle (i.e. doing it with their wife or partner) and for some of you the interest remains a fantasy that you enjoy by reading blogs such as this or visiting cuckolding websites. Either way:
(1) what is it about cuckolding that makes you hot?
(2) what part (if any) does humiliation play in this for you?
From my reading about it, cuckolding is often put together with femdom, as it can be part of the Dom/sub dynamic for some couples.
(3) Do any of you who enjoy cuckolding think of themselves as a submissive, or is this idea off track?
I’m keeping my questions short and sweet, as I’d like to just keep this informal and see where the chat takes us!
It would really help me if when you replied you gave some small amount of detail about yourself (nothing incriminating of course :) ), things such are you married, are you actively a cuck, just fantasing about being a cuck, has there been more than one partner who has cuckolded with you, what sort of profession do you work in, what age bracket are you in.
Thanks ahead of time to all of you that take the time to share!
Cheers,
Angela
-----------------------------
Hi everyone,
My name is Angela and I’m an Australian doing some research for an upcoming publication on fetishes and kink. Jinxy has been kind enough to help with me some information on cuckolding and also given me the opportunity to pose some questions here on her blog to those of you interested in cuckolding.
First off I’m interested to know what attracts a man to being a cuck. Some of you will be already living this lifestyle (i.e. doing it with their wife or partner) and for some of you the interest remains a fantasy that you enjoy by reading blogs such as this or visiting cuckolding websites. Either way:
(1) what is it about cuckolding that makes you hot?
(2) what part (if any) does humiliation play in this for you?
From my reading about it, cuckolding is often put together with femdom, as it can be part of the Dom/sub dynamic for some couples.
(3) Do any of you who enjoy cuckolding think of themselves as a submissive, or is this idea off track?
I’m keeping my questions short and sweet, as I’d like to just keep this informal and see where the chat takes us!
It would really help me if when you replied you gave some small amount of detail about yourself (nothing incriminating of course :) ), things such are you married, are you actively a cuck, just fantasing about being a cuck, has there been more than one partner who has cuckolded with you, what sort of profession do you work in, what age bracket are you in.
Thanks ahead of time to all of you that take the time to share!
Cheers,
Angela
Monday, March 1, 2010
Queen KC and Jinxypie, ready and waiting!
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